Revenge Of The Fallen Contractor

.......In the beginning of time, robots once rule the earth. Conquering the world. But it has disappeared over the time with no one knows of their presence and they left no trace behind.

Some claimed it has transformed into something that forms part of our daily life machinery.

When the sun comes down, they are believed to transformed from it original stature to the most destructive and powerful machines you will see on earth. 

Nowadays, Mother Nature is giving us a sign of their resurgence. Something weird has happened in this part of the world.

Is it a sign of Thor coming to save us?

Or "something" coming to give rise to the fallen?

It it once claimed our so-called best companion for human race. Now they had transformed and changed. We are now witnessing the  revenge of the fallen contractor!

Modern Toilet - Do Not Disturb, Doing "Business" Now!

Eat to live or live to eat? Which one are you? Recently, my company annual event organizer asked me why chose option B over option A. Option A was a dinner buffet at 5 stars hotel. Option B was short cruise+simple activities+ buffet dinner at a restaurant. The reason I gave was, what goes in goes out eventually. Option B offers me some activities which will give me some memories of activities together with my colleagues. I’m been eating lunch with my colleague almost everyday. Therefore, eating at a 5 star buffet does not really matter to me anymore. Unless that place has something special to offer other than food.

I was in Hong Kong last year. Fortunately, my sister in law had just been transferred back to Hong Kong for one year. When she asked me where to meet up, I suggested to her the Modern Toilet restaurant. I’ve been receiving emails about this place for a long time. Well, what goes in goes out. What if the “goes in” served together with the “goes out” . Now that is special. Have you ever thought of eating while poo poo? Or drinking water while pee pee? Having known this place thru all those spam emails, I found it strange that my sister-in-law does not even know the existence of this place.

Once I stepped in, the smell I got was not those typical smell you will encounter when you entered your school’s toilet. Seeing so many toilet bowls in my life, it raised my curiosity whether the bowl is real. I lifted up the cover thinking I might get some “special” stuff inside.

But it was empty. Flipping thru the menu itself, I was laughing looking at the photos of food which was shaped up to everything you might ever imagine inside a toilet.

Even the bowl used to serve our rice is not that typical rice bowl but instead toilet bowl! I was very impressed with how they decorated the restaurant. Toilet bowls as seats and also china ware.

Urinal pot as cup and ornament for wall décor.

Toilet pump as light cover.

Even the sinks were not spared. They were used as table stand.

How about the food? Ironically, my sister-in-law’s dish was delicious. I guess the “aroma” of the toilet bowl must have seep into the dish and give the extra “oomph” taste.

After the meal, I decided to visit their washroom. Who knows if the washroom resembles the kitchen instead? Much to my disappointment, it does not.

When my sister-in-law came to visit us early this year, she told me the Modern Toilet that we went in Kowloon was closed. Surprisingly, it was not closed down by Health Ministry Department but due to poor business. I guess the reception turned lukewarm just like those Chinese and Malay sayings go:

1. The 3 minutes of warmth of poo poo (Chinese).
2. Hangat hangat tahi ayam (Malay).

Hong Kong - Another Chapter, Another Story, Another Experience

So, I'm back. After spending half of my 2009 in Hong Kong. The longest ever trip I've been to oversea. What I've got? I lost contact with most of my friends. My handphone endured the longest silence in its history of telecommunication. Sometimes, I even try to check whether it is actually working. Looking back, I did experienced a lot of things there. Most of it is life experience. I've been stuck in Malaysia for the whole of my 25 years. The person I see, talk and deal is from within my circle. My previous trip to Brunei and UK does not give me much chance to get in touch with the people from that country.

Being day in day out with my Hong Kong colleague every day and night (yup at night too), I learn and see different things. Hong Kong in some cases look like the one I used to watch in TV drama series. But the people are of different case. See, you won't find Chan Ho Nam and Hung Hing group loitering around the street with their machetes. The same goes with all the gun fighting and car chasing of what you see in Jackie Chan's movie.

I was told Hong Kong is a man made tourism attraction. Most of the hot spots here are man made wonders. I've been to this Ting Kau bridge often mistakenly referred as the Tsing Ma bridge. However, I think Ting Kau bridge is much more beautiful than the others when they light it at night.

With the population density so high, there are a lot of people waiting in line to get jobs. It's not tough looking for job here though. Just that you can't be choosy. That is why you see everyone is carrying out their duty diligently. When even the one sweeping the road is so hardworking, you will see streets and public amenities are being well taken care of. Good maintenance is the word.

During my stay here, I had actually switched 4 accommodations. One in Ting Kau then to Kwai Chung then to Ting Kau and then to Tsuen Wan. Long story. In short, all because of money. My second last hotel was in Royal View. Blessed with the acclaimed "royal" view, I don't develop any fond with this place actually. Just imagine I put you in a castle way far into the jungle. You can view the sun set and rise behind those mountainous terrain. I give you a giant bed, gold plated toilet and even a Olympics size swimming pool (I exaggerated) only to find that you have no kitchen! No kitchen means no food. Because of this, you have to forage into the jungle every evening to get the stock you need. The fact that you have refrigerator is good for you to store your catch. But when you turn around only to find that they don't provide you any heat generating machine like microwave or oven. *@#!! Making a bonfire will only land yourself with a visit from Wong Hei (the actor from the famous drama series Burning Flame). Yup, that's what happened to us from the previous hotel we stayed. Not to scare you, they were on the verge of using axe to hack off our door, only for my last minute intervention of opening the door. With me rubbing my eye and asked,

"Any problem sir in the middle of the night like this?"

I tasted the famous food around. Their so-called Lin Heung Lau that boasts those old days dim sum shop atmosphere. Yeah, I found the atmosphere is there especially when all the waiters that serve you are of the generation before you. As for the food, I would say some are nice and some are not into your taste bud mainly because we are not exposed to it when we were young. I found it very amusing the way the people here wash their utensils. One cup of tea is served for us to drink. But the culture here is that most people use it to wash their chopstick, bowl, spoon and even plate. Yup plate too. You just have to be skillful to do it.

I enjoy the famous egg tarts there. I must admit it is of different class from the one in Malaysia. Here they use lard in most of their food preparation. When it comes to taste, who cares how healthy is spelt. To them well Chinese to be more precise, any animals in the world with their back facing the sky is edible. When I say edible, that includes every organs inside too. Private parts included. Therefore, I always believe we can easily win Fear Factor challenge.

I even experienced the hassle to queue up outside restaurant just to get your number. Talk about how grand some normal restaurant can be. In Malaysia, you just go in and stand beside one table with the whole family nearly into the completion of their dinner. Putting a pity-looking face you stare at the mother on the table who sheepishly trying to sip the tea. The daring one with a face as thick as concrete might sits on an empty seat besides the poor amah who is trying to dig the chicken meat stuck behind her teeth. When the whole family leave the table, you raise your arm yelling to your other battalion to signal that you had successfully conquer one territory. In Hong Kong, you just need to take your number and sit at the waiting lounge.

A friend of mine once warn me to be careful with the cunning people there. I was quite scared at first. But when I was there, yeah I do see some cunning people but that does not paint the whole picture there. In every society, there are bad people for sure. May it be in Hong Kong and in Malaysia too. That depends on your luck. I met some nice people too when I was there.

From left : Jacky, Edwin, me and Poon

My last 30 days story

Noah and The Longest Rainstorm

story by Linda Sue

At the beginning of time, when God first created the world and all that was in it, everything was perfect. God looked at His work and called it all very good. All that changed when Adam and Eve sinned. Of course, God was a loving God and forgave them, so they could continue to live on the earth and enjoy the blessings of God, but that didn't erase sin. People became more and more wicked. God looked down at the world and was sorry about all the evil things people were doing. In fact, He was sorry that He had even created man! However, there was one man that loved God and was righteous. His name was Noah.

God talked to Noah and told him what He was going to do. He told Noah to talk to everyone he could and warn them that He was going to destroy the earth and everything in it. He also told Noah to start building an ark, which is another name for a big boat. This ark was going to be so big that there would be room for two of every kind of animal in the whole world and seven of certain types of animals.

Noah and his three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth, began building. They had to chop down trees and make smooth boards. They had to put the boards together piece by piece, according to the instructions which God had given them. They had to make pitch to coat the ark so that it would be waterproof. The whole time they were working, Noah was also preaching to the people. He warned them to turn back to God or they would all be destroyed. He told them it was going to start raining and would continue to rain for forty days......but no one believed him.

Instead of turning back to God, they started making fun of Noah. They thought he was crazy for building such a big ark. Besides that, the people had never seen rain, because, up until that time, the earth was watered by dew that rested on the ground during the evening. They laughed and laughed at Noah because of his strange talk. They just didn't believe anything was going to happen to them. They continued being sinful. Just after Noah and his sons had pounded in the last nail and made sure the ark was sealed and waterproofed properly, the Lord spoke to Noah.

"Take seven of every kind of clean animal and two of every kind of unclean animal into the ark. Then take your wife, your sons, and their wives into the ark."

So that is just what Noah did. Into the ark went seven cows, seven sheep, seven goats, seven chickens, seven ducks, seven turkeys, two lions, two bears, two elephants, two giraffes, two zebras, two dogs, two cats, two lizards, two spiders, two tiny ladybugs, and.... Well, I think you get the idea! The people outside were looking on in amazement.

"That old Noah must be crazy!" someone exclaimed.

"He sure is! I just can't understand why he would want to live in that big boat with all those stinky animals!" someone else remarked.

Noah looked at the people sadly. He knew there was nothing he could do to make them believe that God meant what He said, but he kindly invited anyone who wanted, to join his family in the ark so they would be safe. As he suspected, they still didn't believe, and they laughed and snickered louder. Noah and his family and all the animals spent their first night in the ark. When they awoke the next morning, they heard the people outside making fun of them.

"Hey, Noah! I thought you said it was going to rain," they sneered.

"Well, it didn't! You were just wrong!"

They awoke the second day . . .

and the third day . . .

and the fourth day . . .

and still there was no rain.

The people outside were taunting and yelling even louder. But Noah remained calm and continued to invite them inside the ark so they would be safe. The fifth day and the sixth day were no different; there was no rain, and the jeering of the crowd didn't stop, but Noah continued to warn the people and invite them into the ark. The seventh day started out the same as all the others, but, then, slam! God shut the door of the ark. Noah heard someone exclaim,

"Hey! What was that? I thought I felt a drop of water!"

Then someone else felt it, and another, and another . . . and it continued raining . . . and raining . . . and raining . . . The water was getting higher and higher, and it wasn't long before the ark started floating.

10 days . . .

11 days . . .

12 days . . .

"Uh . . . Hey, Dad . . . How long did you say it was going to rain?"

"Forty," Noah replied.

21 . . .

22 . . .

23 . . .

They looked out the window, but all they could see was water . . . and more rain.

35 . . .

36 . . .

37 . . .

38 . . .

Poor Mrs. Noah! She was thankful that God had protected them throughout this whole ordeal, and she didn't want to complain, but she just didn't think she could take one more day of this! The camels were beginning to really stink! The elephant enjoyed sticking its head out the window, then spraying everybody with water! The cats were shedding hair all over the place, and the monkeys were getting into everything!

"Only two more days," she thought.

On the fortieth day, just as God had said, the rain (pause here for emphasis) stopped. Everyone was so happy to be able to look out the window and not see rain! But they couldn't leave the ark just yet. As far as they could see, water covered everything. Even the mountaintops were covered with water and could not be seen. Slowly, the water began to go down and rivers and lakes started to appear all over the place. They looked out the window one day and were able to see the tip of a mountain. B......ump!

"What was that?"

They noticed that the ark had stopped floating.

"We must have landed!" they decided.

They had landed. Right on top of Mount Ararat. Noah wanted to see if was time to come out of the ark, so he opened a window and let one of the ravens fly out. He watched as the raven flew around. Then he sent out a dove. He watched as the dove tried to find a place to rest. Since it couldn't find a good spot to build a nest, it flew back to the ark and Noah knew that there was still too much water on the ground.

After a week had gone by, Noah sent the dove out again. This time he watched as the dove flew and then returned with an olive branch. Noah knew that the waters had gone down and plants were beginning to grow. He waited one more week, opened the window, and let the dove go out once more. This time the dove flew away and did not return. Noah removed the top of the ark and looked out at the dry land. What a wonderful sight!

God assured Noah that it was safe for his family and all the animals to leave the ark. How excited everyone was to be able to walk on dry land! The first thing Noah did was to build an altar and worship God. He was so thankful that the Lord had protected him and his family. He looked up into the sky and saw a beautiful rainbow and heard the voice of God speaking to him. God told Noah that the rainbow was a promise that He would never again destroy the whole earth with a flood.

Modern Day Robin Hood

One day, I was dealt with a situation which suddenly struck an ideology in me. That night itself I woke in the middle of my slumber thinking about it. It's a simple concept.

When some of the wrong things you do are right.

or

When some of the right things you do are wrong.

Alright, before some of you guys jump into conclusion that Au Yong is going insane for being too long at Hong Kong, just give it a thought. I remember a story from my secondary school about a saint who lies. From the first impression, you might think this saint is a bad guy and does not deserves the holiness he portrayed. What he did was wrong. Let me finish the story. On that day, the saint was walking and came across an innocent and weak lady who is running for her life. She told the saint that one group of fierce people is trying to kill her. She begged the saint to mislead the chasing pack behind to the other direction.

The lady then ran away. Not long after that, the saint saw the group of brutal looking people with weapons approached him and asked whether the saint saw a lady they were chasing. Being a saint himself, he knew telling lie is not right according to his life principle. The saint lifted his finger pointed to the opposite way the lady was running. The group went to the direction the saint pointed. I'm sure you know the moral of this story, right? To certain people, telling lie is wrong. But when we see a bigger picture into why the saint did such an act, he was actually trying to save someone's life which is a right action. But if he pointed the direction the lady was running which he thought is right by telling no lies, then he is wrong by getting that helpless lady killed by the ruthless group.

Now back into reality, have we encountered a situation where the things we do which we thought are of no harm to others are indeed the other way round or vice-versa. I would prefer the vice-versa of course but you will never know. In engineering, I would like to use the term"conflict of interest" to describe it. Of course, cunning people comes up with imaginative idea to accomplish one task but it is our duty to not fall into their trap and persuasion. Now this bring us to the theory once again. What this cunning guy thought is wrong but he insist the thing he did is correct. We must be able to take our own judgment by making the reversal of what they want is wrong and what we believe to do is correct. Sound head spinning, right?

Let me give you an example. Recently, I've been to this Hong Kong Racing Course in Happy Valley. To visit. I don't like gambling. I would like to witness what makes the people in Hong Kong to flock into the jockey club every weekend and Wednesday with newspaper tucked under their armpits. The government allows the setting up of this gambling activities. Knowing that gambling is not a good exemplary to the youngsters, they went against the ethical perspective to allow such activities. It's like your parents encourage you to gamble. But, please don't jump to conclusion so fast again. The government looks at it from a different angle.

Knowing that majority of Chinese people are of gambling enthusiast, instead of them gambling away their money to Ah Long or illegal gambling center or even international gambling center which will create more social problems and also draining the countries money away, why not they become the Ah Long or "legal" gambling center. By doing this, the money of their people will only circulate around their own country, creating job opportunity, and the money lost by the betters can be used to fund charitable deed such as setting up of school, sport facilities and hospitals. It's like taking money from the people and give it back to the people. Modern day Robin Hood I would say."Stealing" is wrong but giving the "stealing" of the rich to the poor is right at the end of the day.

So by looking into the bigger picture, setting up gambling center is right by of no means in generating jobs and economy. Recently, the jockey club here opens up betting for soccer too after knowing that large chunk money went to illegal betting of soccer during World Cup, European Cup, Premier League, Scottish League and so on so forth of any soccer leagues that can be gambled. Don't be surprise Malaysia League will also one day be drafted in!

Riders.. Ready..

Get set....

Go!!!

Number 6... Number 6... Go...Go...Go...

Some tips when you enter race course:

1. Don't bring any readable materials that resemble books.
2. Don't tap on anyone shoulder's to ask them of anything.
3. Don't bring monks and pregnant ladies.

You might scold Au Yong is such an old-fashioned superstitious thinking chap. How can gambling be influenced by such things. Em. If you don't believe me, please look at how McDonald's in there boost their sales by renaming their set meals?

Filet-O-Fish Meal = Golden Pool Meal
Chicken McNuggets = Six Win Bonus Meal
McWings Meal = Fly To Win Meal
Big Mac Meal - Big Winner Meal
Double Cheeseburger = Lucky Double Meal

Location: Happy Valley Racecourse

How to get there: Causeway Bay MTR station (Exit A), walk for 20 mins along Wong Nai Chung Road.

Admission fees: $10 HKD

My Name is Earl (When East & West Collides)

There's one popular song from Pet Shop Boys titled "Go West" which boasts the chorus like this:

(Go West) Life is peaceful there
(Go West) In the open air
(Go West) Where the skies are blue
(Go West) This is what we're gonna do

Well, I've seen the West. It's time to go back to the East.

Having been to UK's Madame Tussauds, I was a bit reluctant to spend some amount of money seeing the twins of Brat Pitt, David Beckham and Tom Cruise. Therefore, this time my primary target was to shoot with Asian theme in mind.

Nowadays, my car chit-chat session with the local driver revolves around our work. I grew bored of another demoralising talk about the situation we are in. So, I decided to divert the talking point to another topic. Seeing my assistant outside, I jested him, "Why you choose your English name as Edwin?" He paused a while recalling how he got his name.

"Those day, my English teacher asked whether I have an English name and I say no. She then told me in other to improve my English, it's better for me to have an English name so that she can call me easily. She's the one that proposed the name Edwin."

I shared my experience about an European friend of mine who used to ask me why some of my friends have English name while I don't have (well, he calls me by the name Au Yong). He added, "Is it shown in their passport that they have the name Johnny for example in front of their actual name of Lee Chun Keung?"

"Well, not all actually has the English printed on their identification. Some I knew really carry the names since they were born, while others just adopt the name", I replied.

He looked puzzled, "That's really funny. How can you have another name when you already had a name?"

To him, it's like David Beckham suddenly has another a name in Freddy David Beckham.

If you look carefully, most Asian Chinese love to have an extra English name for example:

Kelly Chan,

Louis Koo,

Leon Lai,

Gillian Chung and Charlene Choi,

Leslie Cheung,

Andy Lau,

Jacky Chan,

Aaron Kwok,

Joey Yung,

and Michelle Yeoh.

I'm pretty sure that most of them do not carry that English names on their identification cards. There are many reasons I came across having an English name. One of them is easier reference in European country. Secondly, is because of religion. And another is what I don't agree much....

An English name makes you look cool.

I've been to UK and interact with the people there. I go by the name Au Yong even though at first they try hard to twist their tongue by not pronouncing Ah Yeung. Eventually, they managed to call my name with fluent pronunciation. Sometimes, this misconception of Caucasian people can't pronounce a Chinese name is unfounded. Some of their names are even harder to pronounce than us. How do you pronounce these few names:

Ruud van Nistelrooy
Dirk Kuyt
Jan Vennegoor Hesselink
Ole Gunnar Solksjaer

You can come up with all the pronunciation but on how to pronounce it properly, you can ask Shebby Singh, our local football pundit. Since their name are so tongue-twisting than Pepsi Twist, do they adopt another name for easier reference. The answer is no.

The driver sitting beside me in the car joined in the fray and added, "It's cultural thing. You must embrace the culture of the country you are visiting. You enter a village you must follow the village's rule."

He recalled his UK experience where he was asked to fill up a form. If you are in Caucasian country and you are happened to be an Asian, you'll probably end up getting you name printed out as Thean Seng Au Yong or Yong Thean Seng Au. Your ancestor won't be happy to see how they change their descendant's surname into Thean or Yong. I'm sure most of you know, Caucasian goes by the surname at the back of their name for example David is the given name while Beckham is the family name.

Ironically, this only happens to Asian in Caucasian country. It won't happen the other way round. If you write Ruud van Nistelrooy, then we Asian will key in Ruud van Nistelrooy. We won't go bold changing the name Nistelrooy Ruud van. I came into an argument once when I was in UK. I was asked why I write the name Au Yong Thean Seng on the front cover of my report. I answered in a simple manner, "Well, it's my name."

I know what he wanted to tell me but I was stating my claim. This is my name and that is how it should be printed out. Eventually, I told him, "Fine, you have your own view, I have mine too. Since that's the case I will write my name with underline on my surname. How a about it?"

I then told the driver how my girlfriend's aunt used to teach her how not to have your surname being changed by the hotel receptionist as Mr. Y.T.S, Au. You just fill up your name and then put an underline on your surname, for example, "Au Yong Thean Seng".

Blending into one's country culture is one thing, but let me ask you one simple question. You don't need to answer me. When Caucasian enter an Asian country, will they adopt an Asian name?

See Toh David Beckham or
Mustapha David Beckham or
Balakrishan Subramaniam David Beckham?

Now this is what I call, "If you enter a village, you must follow the village's rule"

Sometimes, those ancient grandparent gave their newborn grandson the name. Of course, some of the names are nice while those who are unfortunate might end up with names like Tang See Hang or Lee Ah Kow. That's why some prefer you just call them by their English name. That how they see it, but the true meaning behind those Chinese characters are of different materials or species of what crop up in their grandparent's mind. If you know the real meaning behind it, you will be impressed with such a nice name. Take a look at the advertisement by Petronas about this Indian granny scolding the youngster that abandoned his real name and go for some hippy name instead.

Talk about weird name, you have celebrity's name Snoop Doggy Dogg. Everyone knows Snoopy is a dog. Not satisfy with his claim that Snoopy is dog enough, he added the adjective "doggy" into it to strengthen his claim. Funny right? Human to be called animal. That's is why Leo Ku can find the click in his song on why it's better to become a dog or cat than a human.

I have one Malay friend's brother who loved punk style music. Guess what they named their first born son?

Amy Ikon!!

Now that's when East & West collides.

And I happened to collide with Mr President, Barack Hussein Obama..... erm... Obama Hussein Barack..... arghhh .... whatever.... as long as not Osama, ok?

Location: Madame Tussauds Hong Kong

How to get there: Central MTR Station exit J2 & take tram ($33HKD - return) @ Peak Tram Terminus
Admission fees: $150 HKD